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wolfanficsIn the course of writing By The Way, My Sweet Prince, I ended up with a bunch of other small pieces and bits of poetry. I can't attest for the quality of said poetry as it is not my strength, but I hope they're a suitable accompaniment to the series.
I'll just dump them all here, as in revising the tagging and organisation of this journal, it seems a little pointless to keep them separate.
Reunited?
The poison acts fast,
My body goes numb,
Death is swift as winter,
And I, alone, am stunned.
My last breath escapes me,
My body forever gone,
And I see you there before me,
Your smile – how you smile!
So sweetly like I remember.
I rise from my body,
Leave this shack far behind,
And fly into your waiting arms,
My lover back where you belong.
You kiss my lips,
I hold you tight,
Our bodies clear as water,
Yet so strong as ice.
My sweet Prince,
My darling, my love,
How my heart sings with joy,
Now that I have you again.
Nothing else matters,
Just my Prince and me,
My loneliness gone, the aching far away,
Just you and me.
Then darkness falls,
The night becomes everything,
Coldness creeps into our bones,
And the sun doesn’t shine.
A jackal comes,
He takes our hands,
Though fearsome He seems,
His gaze is kind.
We journey into darkness,
Towards a golden room,
Our hearts are singing,
Before the throne of a King!
The judgements are passed,
And we are transformed,
We become shiny-shiny,
Like brand new stars born.
There is nothing but joy,
Peace comes to our souls,
We journey to the world
Where we have earned our rest.
But, dimly, we wonder,
About the world we left behind,
And dare to look
At our home of pain.
We see your parents,
Their hearts broken with glass,
You were ripped from them.
May they in time find peace.
Then, we wonder with sadness,
Where my family is,
Taken from them so young,
Given away like a toy.
They brought me up,
Fed and clothed me as they should
Til we were taken away again,
By a mother with no heart.
She brought us together
As she ripped us apart,
And we fled from her house
As she called us back again.
We ran to her, ran to her,
Like helpless little foals,
Our hearts filled with her love,
Our bodies filled with scars.
The years went by,
The darkness ever present,
Freezing, bleeding, dying, weeping,
Muted we lay at her feet.
Her heart black as night,
She cast us away like toys,
Thrown out on our own,
Into a world of nightmares.
One angel of light,
She brought us some peace,
And you were back home
Being eaten away.
The darkness came,
It invaded you again,
And you slipped away from me,
My heart crushed with pain.
I mourned for you,
Missed you,
Dreamt every night of your face,
While dark-filled nightmares
Chased you away.
When I went back home,
There was no home left.
I was cast out alone,
The unwanted child.
No body wanted me,
No body cared.
I continued to live
Thought I was already dead.
Then the poison I find
Becomes my salvation.
I write my last story for you,
And take my last breath.
And now we are here,
Shiny as stars,
You’re finally here with me,
Held tight in our hearts.
By the way,
My sweet Prince,
I’ll always love you.
Tom
As for this next one, I'd like to apologise for the title. It was four years ago and I didn't know any better. XD
This was based on the Evanescence song My Immortal. I'd read a 'cebo fic based on the same song and sort of got inspired to write my own. I saw this one being written on the train to Maryland, or something like that, so this isn't actually aftermath stuff. OK, I know what it turned into now. It's like Tom's writing stuff down, and Tony's there too, but Tom can't here his thoughts. so Tony's hanging around, seeing/knowing/reading what he's writing, and he has his own thoughts on it and stuff.
Tom, regular; Tony, italics
My Immortal Master
The train winds on, bringing me far from home. I sit here, staring out at land I’ve never seen before. The trees and the grass and the towns and the roads; everything flashes past me before I have time to acknowledge its presence. You’re the only one that stays. I don’t want you to stay. I wish you’d just leave me alone. You’re making me think of you, and all the time we had together, and what we went through. There’s too much there. Too many memories, too much pain, too many things I just want to forget.
I can’t leave you. I don’t want to leave you. I know how much you’re hurting, and I want to make it better like you did for me. You held me, you kissed my tears away, you sang to me when I had nightmares. I want to repay you for all the times you helped me. I’ll never forget the years we had together.
But, I can’t forget. You won’t let me. You’re all I think about. I want so badly for you to be here with me, held in my arms, your small body pressed against me. You’re not fucking here, you’re not fucking here, and I’m left behind!
I’m always here, Tom. I’m never leaving you. I can’t leave you. It hurts too much to leave you. I’m scared that if I leave, I’ll never be with you again. You can’t hold me anymore. You can’t fight my demons for me. I want to be back with you, Tom, back in your safe arms. I’m just so fucking lost.
You haunt my dreams. You invade my sleep. I want so much for you to leave me alone, but I don’t want you to leave. It’s over. I don’t want it to be over. Not having you here with me makes me realise just how alone I really am. No Mistress, no Stefan, no Ton, no parents, no friends, no one. I’m all alone in this new world. Cos you’re not fucking here! You’re not fucking here, Ton! You went away, Ton! You fucking left me here all alone!
I had no choice. I lost the battle … I wasn’t strong enough. They… they beat me, Tom. I was so scared. They hurt me. You were there, Tom, I remember your voice. So scared, so scared, you were crying. Parents. You brought me home, Tom. You brought me home. Nothing I can say or do will ever make up for that.
God, I’m so sorry, Ton. I didn’t mean to get angry with you. I didn’t mean to fall in love with you. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t mean for her to find out. I should’ve been a better slave, should’ve stayed true to my vows. But, how could I when I saw you dance? You were so beautiful. I remember the silks, the jewels, the flash of joy in your eyes, the drums pounding and the music floating through the air. I just happened to walk into the hall where you were dancing. She’d called me that day, and I was happy to be serving her again. I stood on the edge of the room, watching you swirling around. I was captivated. You were shining so brightly that day. I’ve never seen you happier than that day.
The dancing… Gods, I loved the dancing. She… She loved me when I was Ashwinha. I was her little girl. I had everything I wanted. Beautiful clothes. Expensive jewels. Fine foods. I was her favoured one. I alone was the only slave she ever loved. Brian was nothing to her, just a stupid fucktoy. She loved me. She loved me! I never wanted those times to end.
But, then you went away. She took you from me. She changed you. Then, you returned to me, she threw you away, you returned to me, stripped of everything you once were. I held you, you cried, for once, we were closer than we’d ever been. But, you pulled away, I could see you hurting. You lost yourself again, and it took years to find yourself again. You went away. She took you again. She did things to you.
No, don’t make me remember that. I don’t want to remember that! Stop it, Tom. It hurts, it hurts all over again! Gods, please make it stop! … She did terrible things to me, Tom. Please, don’t make me remember that!
When you returned, God, I was ecstatic. You were back with me again. My little Ton, my Ashwinha, you were back with me at last. Oh, so cold, sick, and weak, but back with me. But, I sent you there, I made her do that to you. If I didn’t love you so bad, you wouldn’t have been sent down there. She tortured you because of me! That pain will never leave me. Too many things will never leave me.
All I did was be true to my heart. You made me realise it was you I loved. Your songs, your music, it sang to me at a level nothing has ever done before. I did what I did for you. What she did… doesn’t matter now. But, Gods, did it hurt.
But, I can never forget how happy we were, when Stefan saved us from her. We… we were together at last.
When you cried, I’d wipe away all your tears. When you’d scream, I’d fight away all of your fears. I’ve held your hand through all these years, but you still have all of me. You’re my immortal Master, and I your lowly slave.
Finally, an untitled piece of poetry for your, well, enjoyment may be too generous a word. This was inspired also by the one i just posted, as I wanted to try and turn it into a conversation between Tom and Tony rather than just Tom's POV. Never really finished it. Ran out of steam, I did. Or something like that.
Untitled
Tom
The poison worked fast, Ton,
Took over with ease,
Everything went cold
Darkness fell
My last breath of air
Then stillness
Peace
The light shines all around me,
No coldness, no pain,
I look down to see myself
Lying lifeless in a chair
No pain, no burden of fear,
Only peace and stillness pervade
And the warmth of the light
Brings my soul back to life
I see you smiling there,
And my heart fills with joy
Long years we spent apart
My heart splintered and cracked
Missing you
Missing you more than I can ever say
We press together,
Oh the joy it brings!
I’m crying for you
I’m crying for me
And I never let you go
Tony
I’ve been with you since I died
I couldn’t leave you...
I'll just dump them all here, as in revising the tagging and organisation of this journal, it seems a little pointless to keep them separate.
Reunited?
The poison acts fast,
My body goes numb,
Death is swift as winter,
And I, alone, am stunned.
My last breath escapes me,
My body forever gone,
And I see you there before me,
Your smile – how you smile!
So sweetly like I remember.
I rise from my body,
Leave this shack far behind,
And fly into your waiting arms,
My lover back where you belong.
You kiss my lips,
I hold you tight,
Our bodies clear as water,
Yet so strong as ice.
My sweet Prince,
My darling, my love,
How my heart sings with joy,
Now that I have you again.
Nothing else matters,
Just my Prince and me,
My loneliness gone, the aching far away,
Just you and me.
Then darkness falls,
The night becomes everything,
Coldness creeps into our bones,
And the sun doesn’t shine.
A jackal comes,
He takes our hands,
Though fearsome He seems,
His gaze is kind.
We journey into darkness,
Towards a golden room,
Our hearts are singing,
Before the throne of a King!
The judgements are passed,
And we are transformed,
We become shiny-shiny,
Like brand new stars born.
There is nothing but joy,
Peace comes to our souls,
We journey to the world
Where we have earned our rest.
But, dimly, we wonder,
About the world we left behind,
And dare to look
At our home of pain.
We see your parents,
Their hearts broken with glass,
You were ripped from them.
May they in time find peace.
Then, we wonder with sadness,
Where my family is,
Taken from them so young,
Given away like a toy.
They brought me up,
Fed and clothed me as they should
Til we were taken away again,
By a mother with no heart.
She brought us together
As she ripped us apart,
And we fled from her house
As she called us back again.
We ran to her, ran to her,
Like helpless little foals,
Our hearts filled with her love,
Our bodies filled with scars.
The years went by,
The darkness ever present,
Freezing, bleeding, dying, weeping,
Muted we lay at her feet.
Her heart black as night,
She cast us away like toys,
Thrown out on our own,
Into a world of nightmares.
One angel of light,
She brought us some peace,
And you were back home
Being eaten away.
The darkness came,
It invaded you again,
And you slipped away from me,
My heart crushed with pain.
I mourned for you,
Missed you,
Dreamt every night of your face,
While dark-filled nightmares
Chased you away.
When I went back home,
There was no home left.
I was cast out alone,
The unwanted child.
No body wanted me,
No body cared.
I continued to live
Thought I was already dead.
Then the poison I find
Becomes my salvation.
I write my last story for you,
And take my last breath.
And now we are here,
Shiny as stars,
You’re finally here with me,
Held tight in our hearts.
By the way,
My sweet Prince,
I’ll always love you.
Tom
As for this next one, I'd like to apologise for the title. It was four years ago and I didn't know any better. XD
This was based on the Evanescence song My Immortal. I'd read a 'cebo fic based on the same song and sort of got inspired to write my own. I saw this one being written on the train to Maryland, or something like that, so this isn't actually aftermath stuff. OK, I know what it turned into now. It's like Tom's writing stuff down, and Tony's there too, but Tom can't here his thoughts. so Tony's hanging around, seeing/knowing/reading what he's writing, and he has his own thoughts on it and stuff.
Tom, regular; Tony, italics
My Immortal Master
The train winds on, bringing me far from home. I sit here, staring out at land I’ve never seen before. The trees and the grass and the towns and the roads; everything flashes past me before I have time to acknowledge its presence. You’re the only one that stays. I don’t want you to stay. I wish you’d just leave me alone. You’re making me think of you, and all the time we had together, and what we went through. There’s too much there. Too many memories, too much pain, too many things I just want to forget.
I can’t leave you. I don’t want to leave you. I know how much you’re hurting, and I want to make it better like you did for me. You held me, you kissed my tears away, you sang to me when I had nightmares. I want to repay you for all the times you helped me. I’ll never forget the years we had together.
But, I can’t forget. You won’t let me. You’re all I think about. I want so badly for you to be here with me, held in my arms, your small body pressed against me. You’re not fucking here, you’re not fucking here, and I’m left behind!
I’m always here, Tom. I’m never leaving you. I can’t leave you. It hurts too much to leave you. I’m scared that if I leave, I’ll never be with you again. You can’t hold me anymore. You can’t fight my demons for me. I want to be back with you, Tom, back in your safe arms. I’m just so fucking lost.
You haunt my dreams. You invade my sleep. I want so much for you to leave me alone, but I don’t want you to leave. It’s over. I don’t want it to be over. Not having you here with me makes me realise just how alone I really am. No Mistress, no Stefan, no Ton, no parents, no friends, no one. I’m all alone in this new world. Cos you’re not fucking here! You’re not fucking here, Ton! You went away, Ton! You fucking left me here all alone!
I had no choice. I lost the battle … I wasn’t strong enough. They… they beat me, Tom. I was so scared. They hurt me. You were there, Tom, I remember your voice. So scared, so scared, you were crying. Parents. You brought me home, Tom. You brought me home. Nothing I can say or do will ever make up for that.
God, I’m so sorry, Ton. I didn’t mean to get angry with you. I didn’t mean to fall in love with you. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t mean for her to find out. I should’ve been a better slave, should’ve stayed true to my vows. But, how could I when I saw you dance? You were so beautiful. I remember the silks, the jewels, the flash of joy in your eyes, the drums pounding and the music floating through the air. I just happened to walk into the hall where you were dancing. She’d called me that day, and I was happy to be serving her again. I stood on the edge of the room, watching you swirling around. I was captivated. You were shining so brightly that day. I’ve never seen you happier than that day.
The dancing… Gods, I loved the dancing. She… She loved me when I was Ashwinha. I was her little girl. I had everything I wanted. Beautiful clothes. Expensive jewels. Fine foods. I was her favoured one. I alone was the only slave she ever loved. Brian was nothing to her, just a stupid fucktoy. She loved me. She loved me! I never wanted those times to end.
But, then you went away. She took you from me. She changed you. Then, you returned to me, she threw you away, you returned to me, stripped of everything you once were. I held you, you cried, for once, we were closer than we’d ever been. But, you pulled away, I could see you hurting. You lost yourself again, and it took years to find yourself again. You went away. She took you again. She did things to you.
No, don’t make me remember that. I don’t want to remember that! Stop it, Tom. It hurts, it hurts all over again! Gods, please make it stop! … She did terrible things to me, Tom. Please, don’t make me remember that!
When you returned, God, I was ecstatic. You were back with me again. My little Ton, my Ashwinha, you were back with me at last. Oh, so cold, sick, and weak, but back with me. But, I sent you there, I made her do that to you. If I didn’t love you so bad, you wouldn’t have been sent down there. She tortured you because of me! That pain will never leave me. Too many things will never leave me.
All I did was be true to my heart. You made me realise it was you I loved. Your songs, your music, it sang to me at a level nothing has ever done before. I did what I did for you. What she did… doesn’t matter now. But, Gods, did it hurt.
But, I can never forget how happy we were, when Stefan saved us from her. We… we were together at last.
When you cried, I’d wipe away all your tears. When you’d scream, I’d fight away all of your fears. I’ve held your hand through all these years, but you still have all of me. You’re my immortal Master, and I your lowly slave.
Finally, an untitled piece of poetry for your, well, enjoyment may be too generous a word. This was inspired also by the one i just posted, as I wanted to try and turn it into a conversation between Tom and Tony rather than just Tom's POV. Never really finished it. Ran out of steam, I did. Or something like that.
Untitled
Tom
The poison worked fast, Ton,
Took over with ease,
Everything went cold
Darkness fell
My last breath of air
Then stillness
Peace
The light shines all around me,
No coldness, no pain,
I look down to see myself
Lying lifeless in a chair
No pain, no burden of fear,
Only peace and stillness pervade
And the warmth of the light
Brings my soul back to life
I see you smiling there,
And my heart fills with joy
Long years we spent apart
My heart splintered and cracked
Missing you
Missing you more than I can ever say
We press together,
Oh the joy it brings!
I’m crying for you
I’m crying for me
And I never let you go
Tony
I’ve been with you since I died
I couldn’t leave you...
