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wolfanficsTitle: Some Things Bear Repeating
Author: Sashataakheru
Fandom: The Chaser
Starring: Chris Taylor, Andrew Hansen, Craig Reucassel
Pairings: Chris/Andrew, Craig/Andrew, Chris/Craig
Prompt: #55 Voyeur
Word Count: 2547
Warnings: smut, swearing
Rating: FRAO
Table: http://wolfanfics.dreamwidth.org/37785.html
Disclaimer: I don’t know them, not associated with them, just a slashy fangirl admirer with a very active imagination.
Author’s Notes: Follow on from There's A First Time For Everything, with 18 year old Craig, 19 year old Andrew and 21 year old Chris.
Summary: Chris ponders the repercussions of sleeping with Andrew and temptation gets the better of him.
Some Things Bear Repeating
Craig wandered home with his other housemates some time before dawn. Andrew was fast asleep and shifted slightly as Craig slid into bed beside him. Craig thought about the guy he’d seen in Andrew’s bed before he’d gone out again. He wasn’t jealous, though. His relationship with Andrew had plenty of room for screwing around. They weren’t some ecstatically happy and committed couple who were totally exclusive. They just fucked around with each other, and occasionally fucked others. It was just how it was.
Craig lay awake for some time, fascinated by the way Andrew slept. He lay on his side and watched his face and the little twitches it made. He saw his eyes moving underneath his lids and wondered what he was dreaming about. For a moment, Craig wondered if this wasn’t what he’d been searching for. Maybe he and Andrew should be exclusive.
With a gentle touch, Craig brushed his hair out of his face and pressed a soft kiss on his forehead before settling back to go to sleep. He watched as Andrew’s fingers reached for his. Craig linked their fingers together and almost wished he could keep this forever. Craig was beginning to realise just how much he loved Andrew and this realisation hit him hard. As a result, he didn’t get as much sleep as he’d liked.
Andrew was up before ten the next morning. No one else was awake, not that Andrew expected them to be awake. He knew what time they’d probably arrived back. Like they were going to emerge before lunchtime. Andrew thought about Chris as he made breakfast. He wondered if he hadn’t been too forward with him. Chris was flighty and sensitive at best. Perhaps he should ring him and make sure Chris was still talking to him. Yes, that might be a good idea. He’d hate to have ruined their relationship. He did really like Chris, even if he was a little too fatalistic for Andrew’s tastes.
He took his breakfast and sat in front of the TV while he thought about when a good time would be to call. Mindless Saturday morning TV took over and soon Andrew lost himself in the mind-numbing dullness of it, unconsciously procrastinating.
Chris felt awful when he woke. He had spent the night dreaming about what he’d done with Andrew. It had only served to reinforce the shame he felt at the one pleasure he would willingly deny himself out of sheer cowardice and fear. He buried his face in his pillow as he tried to hide his tears. That he was hard, and not just due to normal male biology, seemed like the worst thing ever that could possibly have happened to him. It was a reminder of how good it had felt being with Andrew and that was something he very much wanted to forget.
“God, why am I so pathetic? I wish I had the courage to do what Andrew does. I would do anything to be rid of the shame I feel,” Chris murmured.
His mother stuck her head in his room then, greeting him cheerily. Chris winced and hurriedly wiped his eyes. He turned and greeted his mother, trying not to look upset.
“You got in late last night. Have a good time?” she asked.
“Yeah, yeah. It was good,” Chris said, too scared to even hint at what he’d done.
“Don’t stay in there too long, we’ve got guests coming over soon,” she added.
“If I stay in here, they won’t know I’m here,” Chris said. The last thing he wanted was to spend his Saturday having to be good for his mother’s guests.
His mother simply gave him A Look. Chris sighed and sat up in bed. Looks like his homework for uni would have to be done later.
“Alright, fine. I’ll get up. Get me some coffee brewing?” Chris tried.
“You’re half an hour late for that. Make it yourself. Now get up,” his mother said.
Chris watched her close his door and leave him alone. Chris rubbed his eyes. Oh, it was going to be a long day. Resigned to his fate, Chris got up and headed for a shower, hoping the unwanted guests wouldn’t stay forever.
Craig wandered out of bed after midday, as Andrew had suspected. Andrew hadn’t called Chris yet. He was waiting for the right moment, and he didn’t want to do it while the house was full. Craig yawned and sat down next to Andrew as he watched some movie Craig couldn’t identify.
“Morning,” Craig said.
“Good afternoon,” Andrew said.
“That’s what I meant. So, good night last night?” Craig said.
“Yeah, good night. Chris is good company when he’s not moping,” Andrew said.
“That the bloke you fucked last night?” Craig said.
“Yeah, that was him. Poor guy, he’s so wound up. I don’t see him coming out for a very long time, if he ever comes out at all,” Andrew said.
“Christ, Andrew, that’s the fourth guy this year. What is it with you and guys like that? You need to start cruising gay bars with me,” Craig said.
“I do go out cruising with you. And I didn’t even befriend Chris to fuck him in the first place. It just, you know, ended up that way,” Andrew said.
“I bet he wasn’t as good as me,” Craig said.
“Fucking virgin. How adorable,” Andrew said with a smirk.
“You little minx. So, if you didn’t chat him up for a fuck, why did you bother then?” Craig said.
“He was cute, and he was sitting in the darkest corner of the pub, looking miserable. I offered a shoulder to cry on. It wasn’t til last night I bothered breaking the sexual tension. Little fucker was too cowardly to do it himself. See, unlike you, I am capable of befriending guys I don’t necessarily want to sleep with,” Andrew said.
“Yeah, that’d be right. So, you going to see him again then?” Craig said.
“Dunno. I’ll call him later, make sure I haven’t scared him off. He’s a little sensitive about his sexuality,” Andrew said.
“You really know how to pick ‘em, don’t you?” Craig said.
“It’s a natural talent,” Andrew said, leaning back into the couch.
It was mid-afternoon by the time Chris was released from entertaining guests. Chris slunk off to his room and shut the door. Chris was imbued with ambivalence. His mother’s guests had meant a long and arduous performance at normality, convincing them he was a perfectly well-adjusted individual, when he knew in his heart he wasn’t. His brother’s presence hadn’t helped matters. Chris was much better at pretending when he wasn’t there.
All it took was for his mother to mention the fact Chris was still single and they spent the rest of the time scolding him, trying to find a suitable girl for him, and comparing him to his brother. It happened the same way every time. Chris knew the script by now and hated every moment of it.
Chris sighed as he lay down on his bed. He was sick of company. He needed to get out of the house. On a whim, he called Andrew. He needed a retreat. Fuck what happened between them the night before. Andrew was surprised by his call, but it did save him making the call himself. Chris asked if it was alright to come over. Andrew, naturally, agreed. Chris thanked him and changed before heading off to Andrew’s house. He parked outside and took a moment to settle himself. Andrew opened the front door to him as he saw him approach and invited him inside warmly.
“Come on in, kettle’s hot. Craig’s in the lounge. The others are out, or still asleep,” Andrew said.
“Thanks. Good to see you again,” Chris said.
“Bad day? You look like you’re this close to murdering someone,” Andrew said.
“It’s a long story. Mum had guests over and, well, after all that, I needed to get out of the house,” Chris said.
“I sympathise. Come through then. I’ll make some coffee,” Andrew said, ushering Chris down the hall towards the lounge room.
Craig rose to greet him. “So you’re Chris, hey? I’m Craig,” he said, extending his hand.
“Yeah, Chris Taylor. Pleased to meet you in slightly less intimate circumstances,” Chris said.
Craig chuckled. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell. I never do. Andrew was right. You are cute.”
“Ah, thanks. You’re quite the looker yourself,” Chris said.
“Oh, don’t start on him. You’ll never shut him up otherwise,” Andrew said as he returned with coffee.
“He’s exaggerating. My ego isn’t that big,” Craig said with a wink.
“And by ego, he means his cock, and trust me, I should know,” Andrew said.
“No, you are a filthy liar, that’s what. Don’t believe a word he says. He’s the one with the tiny cock,” Craig says.
“Ignore him, Chris. He’s just being a dickhead,” Andrew said, taking a seat on one of the armchairs. “Do sit down, guys,” he added.
Craig flopped back into his seat. Chris sat down a little more elegantly. He did his best to relax. It was difficult when Craig was sitting there looking so enticing, not to mention Andrew as well. Chris’ sexuality was threatening to betray his hard-fought gains and out him as the queer he was. Chris wondered if they could even see what he was fighting against.
“So, Chris, want to bitch about what’s got you so annoyed?” Andrew said, passing him a mug.
“It’s difficult to explain,” Chris began, unsure where to start.
“Want me to go so you and Hansen can have some secret time?” Craig said.
“No, no, you’re alright. It’s just not something that’s easy to talk about,” Chris said.
“Don’t feel obliged, Chris, it was just an offer,” Andrew said. “By all means, we can merely talk about other things.”
“I just don’t know where to start,” Chris said with a sigh of resignation. He saw the look Andrew gave him. That was not a look that said he should drop it.
“Well, is it one thing or many things?” Andrew said.
“It’s one big thing that creates lots of little ones, or lots of little ones that make one big one. One of the two,” Chris said.
“Look, you’ve told me enough to have some idea of what’s wrong, but I want you to say it,” Andrew said.
“Since when did you start counselling, Hansen?” Craig said.
“I’m not counselling. Don’t you think he looks like someone who needs to just tell whatever it is he’s hiding inside him?” Andrew said.
“I reckon he needs a good hard shagging, personally,” Craig said.
Chris lowered his head. No. He would not give in again. That was what had caused all this grief to begin with. Pretty Craig could go shag someone else, thank you very much.
“Come on, love, I know you’re not adverse to some man action. I did see you with my Andrew last night. Something the matter now?” Craig said.
“I’m not gay. I don’t normally sleep with men,” Chris said, doubting his decision to run to Andrew.
“Fine then. Suit yourself. I hope you don’t mind if I maul Andrew then. He owes me for last night,” Craig said, sending a lustful look in Andrew’s direction.
“Sure, whatever. I’ll just stay here til you’re done. I wouldn’t want to intrude,” Chris said, sinking back into the couch for comfort.
Craig pulled Andrew over to the couch and onto his lap. Andrew rested his arms on Craig’s shoulders as he kissed him. Chris squirmed, not sure he should stay when they were getting so intimate with each other right beside him. What was the proper protocol for a situation like this?
“Ahh, I’ll-I’ll go, I think,” Chris said, standing up.
Craig turned to look at him. “I don’t care how not gay you are or aren’t. Sit the fuck down and we’ll deal with you, alright?”
Chris did so. The part of himself he thought he’d locked away for good was creeping out again and he wasn’t at all happy about it. He shifted closer to Craig on his command and watched in desperate need as Craig’s hand slid down his thigh towards his groin. The more Craig worked him, the less Chris wanted to refuse him.
Chris didn’t last long. He soon gave in to his shallow hormones and his sex drive. It wasn’t long before he was half naked and lying back on the couch as Craig worked his body. Andrew cradled his head in his lap and gently stroked his head. Chris barely hesitated in replying to Craig’s offer of sex. He’d already been fucked by a guy; one more time couldn’t hurt.
Craig was different to Andrew. Andrew was considerate and attentive. Craig seemed to lose himself in pleasure. All Chris could do was give in and hold on tight.
Chris lay there breathless afterwards. Craig lay beside him, resting his head on his chest. Chris knew he would regret this when he got home, but at that moment, he didn’t really care. Andrew still stroked his hair, the feel of his fingers lending Chris some comfort.
“I don’t know if I can keep doing this. The shame seems insurmountable,” Chris murmured.
“Someone who lives a lie isn’t living at all,” Craig said.
“If you knew my family, you would understand why I’m so scared,” Chris said.
“Lose the ‘poor me’ façade. It’s pathetic. Don’t you have any spine at all?” Craig said.
“Leave him alone, Craig. Don’t rush him. Some guys need to get there in their own time,” Andrew said, swatting at Craig.
“Just let me stay here a while until I feel up to going home,” Chris said.
“Stay as long as you like. You’re a big boy now,” Craig said.
“Thanks. I appreciate it,” Chris said.
“Come on, if we’re going to lie here naked, we should do it in the bedroom. I’d rather not have our housemates witness this,” Andrew said.
With some reluctance, Craig and Chris followed Andrew back to the bedroom, bringing their clothes with them. The door was shut and Chris watched as Craig and Andrew embraced.
“I, uh, hope you don’t mind. I do owe him a fuck. Won’t be long, alright?” Andrew said.
Chris sunk into the chair in the corner as he watched them. It was like torture. He wanted their freedom and confidence. Chris merely stayed where he was, a hand keeping check of his arousal. He’d begun masturbating before he was conscious of his actions. Right at that moment, he knew with absolute clarity that he was gay. Here he was, wanking to the two guys fucking on the bed. It was an orgasm filled with guilt and he hid his head as he turned away, ashamed at how low he’d fallen.
It would be hours before Chris went home again. He shut himself in his room, throwing his clothes off and slipping into bed. He sat on his hands as he prayed to God to cleanse him, to make him better. That no reply came send him to tears as he buried his head in his pillow. How he so desperately wished he’d been born into a better family.
Author: Sashataakheru
Fandom: The Chaser
Starring: Chris Taylor, Andrew Hansen, Craig Reucassel
Pairings: Chris/Andrew, Craig/Andrew, Chris/Craig
Prompt: #55 Voyeur
Word Count: 2547
Warnings: smut, swearing
Rating: FRAO
Table: http://wolfanfics.dreamwidth.org/37785.html
Disclaimer: I don’t know them, not associated with them, just a slashy fangirl admirer with a very active imagination.
Author’s Notes: Follow on from There's A First Time For Everything, with 18 year old Craig, 19 year old Andrew and 21 year old Chris.
Summary: Chris ponders the repercussions of sleeping with Andrew and temptation gets the better of him.
Some Things Bear Repeating
Craig wandered home with his other housemates some time before dawn. Andrew was fast asleep and shifted slightly as Craig slid into bed beside him. Craig thought about the guy he’d seen in Andrew’s bed before he’d gone out again. He wasn’t jealous, though. His relationship with Andrew had plenty of room for screwing around. They weren’t some ecstatically happy and committed couple who were totally exclusive. They just fucked around with each other, and occasionally fucked others. It was just how it was.
Craig lay awake for some time, fascinated by the way Andrew slept. He lay on his side and watched his face and the little twitches it made. He saw his eyes moving underneath his lids and wondered what he was dreaming about. For a moment, Craig wondered if this wasn’t what he’d been searching for. Maybe he and Andrew should be exclusive.
With a gentle touch, Craig brushed his hair out of his face and pressed a soft kiss on his forehead before settling back to go to sleep. He watched as Andrew’s fingers reached for his. Craig linked their fingers together and almost wished he could keep this forever. Craig was beginning to realise just how much he loved Andrew and this realisation hit him hard. As a result, he didn’t get as much sleep as he’d liked.
Andrew was up before ten the next morning. No one else was awake, not that Andrew expected them to be awake. He knew what time they’d probably arrived back. Like they were going to emerge before lunchtime. Andrew thought about Chris as he made breakfast. He wondered if he hadn’t been too forward with him. Chris was flighty and sensitive at best. Perhaps he should ring him and make sure Chris was still talking to him. Yes, that might be a good idea. He’d hate to have ruined their relationship. He did really like Chris, even if he was a little too fatalistic for Andrew’s tastes.
He took his breakfast and sat in front of the TV while he thought about when a good time would be to call. Mindless Saturday morning TV took over and soon Andrew lost himself in the mind-numbing dullness of it, unconsciously procrastinating.
Chris felt awful when he woke. He had spent the night dreaming about what he’d done with Andrew. It had only served to reinforce the shame he felt at the one pleasure he would willingly deny himself out of sheer cowardice and fear. He buried his face in his pillow as he tried to hide his tears. That he was hard, and not just due to normal male biology, seemed like the worst thing ever that could possibly have happened to him. It was a reminder of how good it had felt being with Andrew and that was something he very much wanted to forget.
“God, why am I so pathetic? I wish I had the courage to do what Andrew does. I would do anything to be rid of the shame I feel,” Chris murmured.
His mother stuck her head in his room then, greeting him cheerily. Chris winced and hurriedly wiped his eyes. He turned and greeted his mother, trying not to look upset.
“You got in late last night. Have a good time?” she asked.
“Yeah, yeah. It was good,” Chris said, too scared to even hint at what he’d done.
“Don’t stay in there too long, we’ve got guests coming over soon,” she added.
“If I stay in here, they won’t know I’m here,” Chris said. The last thing he wanted was to spend his Saturday having to be good for his mother’s guests.
His mother simply gave him A Look. Chris sighed and sat up in bed. Looks like his homework for uni would have to be done later.
“Alright, fine. I’ll get up. Get me some coffee brewing?” Chris tried.
“You’re half an hour late for that. Make it yourself. Now get up,” his mother said.
Chris watched her close his door and leave him alone. Chris rubbed his eyes. Oh, it was going to be a long day. Resigned to his fate, Chris got up and headed for a shower, hoping the unwanted guests wouldn’t stay forever.
Craig wandered out of bed after midday, as Andrew had suspected. Andrew hadn’t called Chris yet. He was waiting for the right moment, and he didn’t want to do it while the house was full. Craig yawned and sat down next to Andrew as he watched some movie Craig couldn’t identify.
“Morning,” Craig said.
“Good afternoon,” Andrew said.
“That’s what I meant. So, good night last night?” Craig said.
“Yeah, good night. Chris is good company when he’s not moping,” Andrew said.
“That the bloke you fucked last night?” Craig said.
“Yeah, that was him. Poor guy, he’s so wound up. I don’t see him coming out for a very long time, if he ever comes out at all,” Andrew said.
“Christ, Andrew, that’s the fourth guy this year. What is it with you and guys like that? You need to start cruising gay bars with me,” Craig said.
“I do go out cruising with you. And I didn’t even befriend Chris to fuck him in the first place. It just, you know, ended up that way,” Andrew said.
“I bet he wasn’t as good as me,” Craig said.
“Fucking virgin. How adorable,” Andrew said with a smirk.
“You little minx. So, if you didn’t chat him up for a fuck, why did you bother then?” Craig said.
“He was cute, and he was sitting in the darkest corner of the pub, looking miserable. I offered a shoulder to cry on. It wasn’t til last night I bothered breaking the sexual tension. Little fucker was too cowardly to do it himself. See, unlike you, I am capable of befriending guys I don’t necessarily want to sleep with,” Andrew said.
“Yeah, that’d be right. So, you going to see him again then?” Craig said.
“Dunno. I’ll call him later, make sure I haven’t scared him off. He’s a little sensitive about his sexuality,” Andrew said.
“You really know how to pick ‘em, don’t you?” Craig said.
“It’s a natural talent,” Andrew said, leaning back into the couch.
It was mid-afternoon by the time Chris was released from entertaining guests. Chris slunk off to his room and shut the door. Chris was imbued with ambivalence. His mother’s guests had meant a long and arduous performance at normality, convincing them he was a perfectly well-adjusted individual, when he knew in his heart he wasn’t. His brother’s presence hadn’t helped matters. Chris was much better at pretending when he wasn’t there.
All it took was for his mother to mention the fact Chris was still single and they spent the rest of the time scolding him, trying to find a suitable girl for him, and comparing him to his brother. It happened the same way every time. Chris knew the script by now and hated every moment of it.
Chris sighed as he lay down on his bed. He was sick of company. He needed to get out of the house. On a whim, he called Andrew. He needed a retreat. Fuck what happened between them the night before. Andrew was surprised by his call, but it did save him making the call himself. Chris asked if it was alright to come over. Andrew, naturally, agreed. Chris thanked him and changed before heading off to Andrew’s house. He parked outside and took a moment to settle himself. Andrew opened the front door to him as he saw him approach and invited him inside warmly.
“Come on in, kettle’s hot. Craig’s in the lounge. The others are out, or still asleep,” Andrew said.
“Thanks. Good to see you again,” Chris said.
“Bad day? You look like you’re this close to murdering someone,” Andrew said.
“It’s a long story. Mum had guests over and, well, after all that, I needed to get out of the house,” Chris said.
“I sympathise. Come through then. I’ll make some coffee,” Andrew said, ushering Chris down the hall towards the lounge room.
Craig rose to greet him. “So you’re Chris, hey? I’m Craig,” he said, extending his hand.
“Yeah, Chris Taylor. Pleased to meet you in slightly less intimate circumstances,” Chris said.
Craig chuckled. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell. I never do. Andrew was right. You are cute.”
“Ah, thanks. You’re quite the looker yourself,” Chris said.
“Oh, don’t start on him. You’ll never shut him up otherwise,” Andrew said as he returned with coffee.
“He’s exaggerating. My ego isn’t that big,” Craig said with a wink.
“And by ego, he means his cock, and trust me, I should know,” Andrew said.
“No, you are a filthy liar, that’s what. Don’t believe a word he says. He’s the one with the tiny cock,” Craig says.
“Ignore him, Chris. He’s just being a dickhead,” Andrew said, taking a seat on one of the armchairs. “Do sit down, guys,” he added.
Craig flopped back into his seat. Chris sat down a little more elegantly. He did his best to relax. It was difficult when Craig was sitting there looking so enticing, not to mention Andrew as well. Chris’ sexuality was threatening to betray his hard-fought gains and out him as the queer he was. Chris wondered if they could even see what he was fighting against.
“So, Chris, want to bitch about what’s got you so annoyed?” Andrew said, passing him a mug.
“It’s difficult to explain,” Chris began, unsure where to start.
“Want me to go so you and Hansen can have some secret time?” Craig said.
“No, no, you’re alright. It’s just not something that’s easy to talk about,” Chris said.
“Don’t feel obliged, Chris, it was just an offer,” Andrew said. “By all means, we can merely talk about other things.”
“I just don’t know where to start,” Chris said with a sigh of resignation. He saw the look Andrew gave him. That was not a look that said he should drop it.
“Well, is it one thing or many things?” Andrew said.
“It’s one big thing that creates lots of little ones, or lots of little ones that make one big one. One of the two,” Chris said.
“Look, you’ve told me enough to have some idea of what’s wrong, but I want you to say it,” Andrew said.
“Since when did you start counselling, Hansen?” Craig said.
“I’m not counselling. Don’t you think he looks like someone who needs to just tell whatever it is he’s hiding inside him?” Andrew said.
“I reckon he needs a good hard shagging, personally,” Craig said.
Chris lowered his head. No. He would not give in again. That was what had caused all this grief to begin with. Pretty Craig could go shag someone else, thank you very much.
“Come on, love, I know you’re not adverse to some man action. I did see you with my Andrew last night. Something the matter now?” Craig said.
“I’m not gay. I don’t normally sleep with men,” Chris said, doubting his decision to run to Andrew.
“Fine then. Suit yourself. I hope you don’t mind if I maul Andrew then. He owes me for last night,” Craig said, sending a lustful look in Andrew’s direction.
“Sure, whatever. I’ll just stay here til you’re done. I wouldn’t want to intrude,” Chris said, sinking back into the couch for comfort.
Craig pulled Andrew over to the couch and onto his lap. Andrew rested his arms on Craig’s shoulders as he kissed him. Chris squirmed, not sure he should stay when they were getting so intimate with each other right beside him. What was the proper protocol for a situation like this?
“Ahh, I’ll-I’ll go, I think,” Chris said, standing up.
Craig turned to look at him. “I don’t care how not gay you are or aren’t. Sit the fuck down and we’ll deal with you, alright?”
Chris did so. The part of himself he thought he’d locked away for good was creeping out again and he wasn’t at all happy about it. He shifted closer to Craig on his command and watched in desperate need as Craig’s hand slid down his thigh towards his groin. The more Craig worked him, the less Chris wanted to refuse him.
Chris didn’t last long. He soon gave in to his shallow hormones and his sex drive. It wasn’t long before he was half naked and lying back on the couch as Craig worked his body. Andrew cradled his head in his lap and gently stroked his head. Chris barely hesitated in replying to Craig’s offer of sex. He’d already been fucked by a guy; one more time couldn’t hurt.
Craig was different to Andrew. Andrew was considerate and attentive. Craig seemed to lose himself in pleasure. All Chris could do was give in and hold on tight.
Chris lay there breathless afterwards. Craig lay beside him, resting his head on his chest. Chris knew he would regret this when he got home, but at that moment, he didn’t really care. Andrew still stroked his hair, the feel of his fingers lending Chris some comfort.
“I don’t know if I can keep doing this. The shame seems insurmountable,” Chris murmured.
“Someone who lives a lie isn’t living at all,” Craig said.
“If you knew my family, you would understand why I’m so scared,” Chris said.
“Lose the ‘poor me’ façade. It’s pathetic. Don’t you have any spine at all?” Craig said.
“Leave him alone, Craig. Don’t rush him. Some guys need to get there in their own time,” Andrew said, swatting at Craig.
“Just let me stay here a while until I feel up to going home,” Chris said.
“Stay as long as you like. You’re a big boy now,” Craig said.
“Thanks. I appreciate it,” Chris said.
“Come on, if we’re going to lie here naked, we should do it in the bedroom. I’d rather not have our housemates witness this,” Andrew said.
With some reluctance, Craig and Chris followed Andrew back to the bedroom, bringing their clothes with them. The door was shut and Chris watched as Craig and Andrew embraced.
“I, uh, hope you don’t mind. I do owe him a fuck. Won’t be long, alright?” Andrew said.
Chris sunk into the chair in the corner as he watched them. It was like torture. He wanted their freedom and confidence. Chris merely stayed where he was, a hand keeping check of his arousal. He’d begun masturbating before he was conscious of his actions. Right at that moment, he knew with absolute clarity that he was gay. Here he was, wanking to the two guys fucking on the bed. It was an orgasm filled with guilt and he hid his head as he turned away, ashamed at how low he’d fallen.
It would be hours before Chris went home again. He shut himself in his room, throwing his clothes off and slipping into bed. He sat on his hands as he prayed to God to cleanse him, to make him better. That no reply came send him to tears as he buried his head in his pillow. How he so desperately wished he’d been born into a better family.